♥
11:40 PM
Monday, September 28
I hate myself and you too.
♥
11:40 PM
♥
11:40 PM
Saturday, July 18
Listening.....
I feel that its so important for people to actually know what it means to listen, and actually put in the effort to. Of course, some people are naturally good listeners, but I guess majority of us aren't. I feel bad everytime I realised I haven't been a good listener to my friends or family at any point, though I try so hard to be aware and remember that communication is not just about fighting to speak.
Getting so excited over what I have to say, then forgetting that the other party is saying something that matters to him/her just cuz it seems insignifant to me.
Brushing away a topic that someone has brought up and reverting to a topic you wanna discuss, cuz it seems so minute (or random or insignificant), but perhaps that person actually wants to tell you something, hoping you would listen for once.
I mean, this happens all the time cuz no one's perfect. But it gets tiring when its always like that I guess. And then, conversations end abruptly and you feel that you've done your job as a listener, commenting once in awhile, but feeling empty.
I guess listening doesnt simply mean thinking, "ok its your turn to talk, then after you its me." People can tell when someone is really listening or not, and when you feel like someone is actually interested and caring about what you are saying, it just makes you wanna tell them more. But no matter how much you love a person, it can get tiring when you feel like someone never really listens, and one day you'll just stop trying to get any message across.
But I thank God for friends and family members who are good listeners, allowing me to pour out my lamentations and sadness when I need to. I promise to carry on trying to be a good listener too, not just a hearer. Esp mum and dad, who always listen to me, whatever sadness and hurt I have. I would die without you two.
I dunno whats the point of this post actually.. Haha..
It didnt use to be like that you know?
Its okay that people change, cuz in every new surrounding, there's bound to be need for adaption and change. But its really sad when a person changes into someone that.. You know he/she isn't like that at heart, but has been influenced to smth else that is not necessarily good.
I feel like I'm speaking in riddles -.-
♥
11:14 PM
I feel that its so important for people to actually know what it means to listen, and actually put in the effort to. Of course, some people are naturally good listeners, but I guess majority of us aren't. I feel bad everytime I realised I haven't been a good listener to my friends or family at any point, though I try so hard to be aware and remember that communication is not just about fighting to speak.
Getting so excited over what I have to say, then forgetting that the other party is saying something that matters to him/her just cuz it seems insignifant to me.
Brushing away a topic that someone has brought up and reverting to a topic you wanna discuss, cuz it seems so minute (or random or insignificant), but perhaps that person actually wants to tell you something, hoping you would listen for once.
I mean, this happens all the time cuz no one's perfect. But it gets tiring when its always like that I guess. And then, conversations end abruptly and you feel that you've done your job as a listener, commenting once in awhile, but feeling empty.
I guess listening doesnt simply mean thinking, "ok its your turn to talk, then after you its me." People can tell when someone is really listening or not, and when you feel like someone is actually interested and caring about what you are saying, it just makes you wanna tell them more. But no matter how much you love a person, it can get tiring when you feel like someone never really listens, and one day you'll just stop trying to get any message across.
But I thank God for friends and family members who are good listeners, allowing me to pour out my lamentations and sadness when I need to. I promise to carry on trying to be a good listener too, not just a hearer. Esp mum and dad, who always listen to me, whatever sadness and hurt I have. I would die without you two.
I dunno whats the point of this post actually.. Haha..
It didnt use to be like that you know?
Its okay that people change, cuz in every new surrounding, there's bound to be need for adaption and change. But its really sad when a person changes into someone that.. You know he/she isn't like that at heart, but has been influenced to smth else that is not necessarily good.
I feel like I'm speaking in riddles -.-
♥
11:14 PM
Friday, July 17
Hello to my lovely friends yue jas glo yan; just wanna say, thank you for being such wonderful friends and for being nearly the only thing that makes going to school a happy affair, besides the fact that I love studying so much and I'm really elated studying everyday:/.....
Anyway, although we're only going to have two years together as schmates (hm but who knows, uni?) but I thank God that I've gotten to know you guys. When I prayed at the start to get to know nice and kind people, I know for sure my prayers were answered and I'm so so so so beyond glad that I got to know you guys (:
Though we may not be that close cuz of the time restriction and the hectic jc lives, please know that you guys keep me going really often! Really do love you all. :D
JIAYOU FOR THIS YEAR WE CAN DO IT. OUR RETARDEDNESS SHALL KEEP EACH OTHER GOING.
Oh and, congrats to xinyue for a new life for her teeth:D
And this is a reminder to glo to not leave some stuff on her face when she comes to sch (or goes out for that matter) AAHAHAHAHAAA cute girl
Andddd to jas, please get well soon!!!:D
Watched Harry Potter today. Shall not say anth and let you guys watch for yourself..... The movie timings were all like nearly full. Bahh. Byebye
♥
10:04 PM
Anyway, although we're only going to have two years together as schmates (hm but who knows, uni?) but I thank God that I've gotten to know you guys. When I prayed at the start to get to know nice and kind people, I know for sure my prayers were answered and I'm so so so so beyond glad that I got to know you guys (:
Though we may not be that close cuz of the time restriction and the hectic jc lives, please know that you guys keep me going really often! Really do love you all. :D
JIAYOU FOR THIS YEAR WE CAN DO IT. OUR RETARDEDNESS SHALL KEEP EACH OTHER GOING.
Oh and, congrats to xinyue for a new life for her teeth:D
And this is a reminder to glo to not leave some stuff on her face when she comes to sch (or goes out for that matter) AAHAHAHAHAAA cute girl
Andddd to jas, please get well soon!!!:D
Watched Harry Potter today. Shall not say anth and let you guys watch for yourself..... The movie timings were all like nearly full. Bahh. Byebye
♥
10:04 PM
Monday, July 13
Okay we're ambiguous again -.- Sheeeesh we cmi heh.
Thank you for all the people who were concerned.. I'm sorry about that :/ Some times I fall into a little misty hole of self pity, which I know is of no use. Actions speak louder than words. Once again, I'll try my best. Thanks all who care, love you all :) I'll try not to fall into emohole again though its really hard sometimes. :)
Off to do essay outline!
♥
10:38 PM
Thank you for all the people who were concerned.. I'm sorry about that :/ Some times I fall into a little misty hole of self pity, which I know is of no use. Actions speak louder than words. Once again, I'll try my best. Thanks all who care, love you all :) I'll try not to fall into emohole again though its really hard sometimes. :)
Off to do essay outline!
♥
10:38 PM
Friday, July 10
We tried to take drastic action once, twice, and failed both times.
Its gnna be the third try soon, I guess.
And I think this time it has to work.
Cuz there's so little time.
Someone tell me how to do it? How to be able to do a thing like that?
Although the pain and loneliness will be all ultimately so we can have our happy ending.
At first, I never planned to fall so deep, till I think I'll never be able to climb out again.
Y'know I never thought I'd be able to love someone this way.
I never knew that I could feel my heart breaking into a million zillion pieces just imagining life without a person other than my family.
I'm a proud person, but I never knew anyone could make me put down so much of my pride.
How did you manage to get hold of my heart so tightly I wanna know
BUT.
I know, this should be the least of my worries now. That's why the need for drastic action?
I am truly, truly stressed out.
What am I gonna do seriously.
I am so tired but I can't bring myself to go sleep cuz my mind will be endlessly tortured by images and thoughts.
I'm scared, tired, and kinda helpless.
This thing is draining me out.....
But I promise I will try my best.
I wanna bury myself in a hole and hide from this.
Crap now I wanna cry.
Go away stupid tears
♥
12:07 AM
Its gnna be the third try soon, I guess.
And I think this time it has to work.
Cuz there's so little time.
Someone tell me how to do it? How to be able to do a thing like that?
Although the pain and loneliness will be all ultimately so we can have our happy ending.
At first, I never planned to fall so deep, till I think I'll never be able to climb out again.
Y'know I never thought I'd be able to love someone this way.
I never knew that I could feel my heart breaking into a million zillion pieces just imagining life without a person other than my family.
I'm a proud person, but I never knew anyone could make me put down so much of my pride.
How did you manage to get hold of my heart so tightly I wanna know
BUT.
I know, this should be the least of my worries now. That's why the need for drastic action?
I am truly, truly stressed out.
What am I gonna do seriously.
I am so tired but I can't bring myself to go sleep cuz my mind will be endlessly tortured by images and thoughts.
I'm scared, tired, and kinda helpless.
This thing is draining me out.....
But I promise I will try my best.
I wanna bury myself in a hole and hide from this.
Crap now I wanna cry.
Go away stupid tears
♥
12:07 AM
Friday, July 3
Sophia your sucha failure, for now.
I hate myself sometimes seriously.
Teachers who just wanna put me down and remind me how lousy I am (for now), leave me alone. I'm trying already ok? It's freaking hard and I wanna do well too. I know my mistakes and I'm trying to change so just let me try. And I am trying to put in my best though its still not my best. Not everyone can put their mind and soul to mug wholeheartedly ALL THE TIME. (just great that i'm in a school where my flaws are zoomed in 1000000%) I'm trying and at least I see myself making progress though it might not show on that screwed up piece of paper.
But I'm glad for nice teachers who really care. I'll work harder for you, too.
JUST WAIT AND SEE
(though i'm tempted to say f it all, who cares, i won't cuz I know i wont mean it in the end)
♥
12:01 AM
I hate myself sometimes seriously.
Teachers who just wanna put me down and remind me how lousy I am (for now), leave me alone. I'm trying already ok? It's freaking hard and I wanna do well too. I know my mistakes and I'm trying to change so just let me try. And I am trying to put in my best though its still not my best. Not everyone can put their mind and soul to mug wholeheartedly ALL THE TIME. (just great that i'm in a school where my flaws are zoomed in 1000000%) I'm trying and at least I see myself making progress though it might not show on that screwed up piece of paper.
But I'm glad for nice teachers who really care. I'll work harder for you, too.
JUST WAIT AND SEE
(though i'm tempted to say f it all, who cares, i won't cuz I know i wont mean it in the end)
♥
12:01 AM
Wednesday, June 17
FML.
Everything feels ultra scrwed now thx alot.
Yes, my studies sucks shit.
Yes, holidays are gnna be over soon and I wasnt as intense as I wanted to be.
Yes, blocks are HERE AGAIN and yay let's screw it up again
Yes, I'm a difficult girlfriend and be glad you don't have the task of having me as one
Yes, whatever.
Damn pissed.
I miss my cousins although they've been staying over alot. I love you guys alot you know? A few of the few people who can make me smile and rmb how blessed I am.
♥
1:36 AM
Everything feels ultra scrwed now thx alot.
Yes, my studies sucks shit.
Yes, holidays are gnna be over soon and I wasnt as intense as I wanted to be.
Yes, blocks are HERE AGAIN and yay let's screw it up again
Yes, I'm a difficult girlfriend and be glad you don't have the task of having me as one
Yes, whatever.
Damn pissed.
I miss my cousins although they've been staying over alot. I love you guys alot you know? A few of the few people who can make me smile and rmb how blessed I am.
♥
1:36 AM
